Someday Soon, I am Totally Going To Get My Shit in Order

Or, hey, remember me? I am that blogger that used to post semi-regularly and then fell into a month and a half of insanity on top of Christmas and holiday stuff and now is trying to find her followers again.

I thought that was too long of a title, so I decided it should be a subtitle. And that is the way it is. Because I have no editor.

As I look at the visual cacophony that is my desk (does that even make sense? Can I say that? Because otherwise, I have a hard time working the word cacophony into my conversations, and I really like that word) and glance at my watch anxiously and realize that no matter how hard I glare at it, I can not make it give me more time, my lower back aches and my mind races. How do other professional parents manage? I have committed time to Jay’s school, to volunteering in the classroom and helping to create a brand new school garden. I have committed to our own community garden to help pull together committees and plan for registration and oh, sure, I’ll take on accounting duties for the garden too, what the heck, because I. Am. A. Sucker. I am racing between phone calls and working with staff and interns and deadlines and a constantly vomiting to-do list that somehow explodes and gets messier by the hour. All compounded by the fact that I can’t take or make phone calls while I am pumping at the office, because of the constant psshh, psshh, psshh, psshh of the breast pump and the total knowingness of whoever is on the phone. Moo.

Here’s the typical day: Drop Jay at school (“Jay! Tuck and roll! Mama has to get to the office! Here, I’ll swerve over to that snow bank, it should break your fall better!). Dash to work. Phone calls, phone calls, meetings, phone calls, glance over a report I really ought to read, try to sound relatively well informed on a call with truly well informed people, pump, pump, pump, gah! It’s 1 pm already! Faster! Faster! Phone calls, writewritewrite, re-write because that sucked, pump, pump, pump, Gah! Late! Phone calls, emails, staff questions. Really late! Go home! Dinner! PTA meeting, bath, bed, honk shooooo… repeat. Criminy. How do other parents do this?

And does their back ache, too?

When I do get my shit together, I am going to call my parents. Hi mom and dad. I miss you. I am going to call my siblings, assuming they remember me. They all rock and I miss them. I am going to get a damn back massage. I am going to take a deep breath. I am going to knit. I am going to read something, like for fun. I am going to garden, instead of just sitting on five committees for it. I am going to run. I am going to sleep, without any dreams of what I didn’t get done at the office. I am going to dance. But right now? I am late. Gah!