You Never Know What You Have Until You Lose it.

If there is anyone here who does not use the internet, please raise your hand.

Is everyone as hopelessly, desperately dependant on the internet as I am? My internet has been down for nearly two weeks now, and I am slowly withering away. Today, I am only a shell of what I used to be. It is so, so, sad. The worst thing is, I don’t know what caused it to pack up and leave.

I was good to it. We had a good relationship, and I thought things were going well. Then one night last week, as Chris tried to download a program from his University, the computer crashed, and took with it my beloved internet. It left a “Dear John” in the form of an error message that reads: “Server Not Found”.

We tried everything we could think of. At first we were in denial. (It’ll come back. Just reboot it. It’s being silly, that’s all). Then we got really, really angry. (“What the *&%$ is wrong with you?! Connect now or I rip your insides out and sell them on E-Bay. Ah, as soon as you connect me, that is.” We took turns talking each other down from slamming the computer onto the sidewalk from our second story apartment. It was not pretty.)

Then we tried bargaining with it. (What do you want? DSL? Wireless? Unlimited internet porn? We’ll give you anything. Anything.) We tried begging (“Please, please, please. I can’t balance the checkbook and Chris can’t do his homework. Chris will fail out of school and we’ll end up bankrupt and living under a bridge if you don’t come back to us. Please?)

It’s not that we haven’t tried to make it work. We have done virus scans, spent hours on the phone with our Internet Service Provider, talked to the University’s Tech department, and done more than our share of fiddling around ourselves. We are simply at a loss. And as the days go by, we find ourselves arriving at acceptance. We simply hate our computer and now realize with a certain sense of calm that we are destined to devolve into Neanderthals, spending our days making rock piles and listening to Pat Robertson.

On the upside, more pictures and posts are available now over at Farquhar’s Foto’s, and the website happens to star the world’s coolest nieces, Becky, Jessie (Jessie-face), and Carmen. So go on over and check them out. But beware. Like their aunt, they can be a little cooky.