One year ago

One year ago today
I woke up still pregnant
I sighed and went into the office
I ran six miles at lunch, and got ran off the trail by three jerks on dirt bikes
I wanted pancakes for dinner but had meatless tacos instead
I sulked about the pancake thing
I pined for you
I rearranged the furniture in your room and then rearranged it again to make it perfect
I huffed at your father because he went to bed when obviously there was still a lot of really, really important work to do
I pushed the dresser back over to the corner, because hmmmmm, yes, it looked better there, after all
I folded, admired and refolded your impossibly tiny onsies and diapers and put them neatly in your dresser drawers
I sorted your socks by color. Then by size. Then type.
I sang a song to you
I went to bed still pregnant. And hungry. For pancakes.
I woke your father up with those magic words: “Babe, my water broke”
I had no idea how wonderful you would be

One year ago tomorrow
You met the people whose voices you already knew
You made our family bigger and better
You came out all scrunched up and perfect
You snuggled into my arms and nursed like a pro
You weighed seven pounds, two ounces

You changed the world forever

Ella, the moment you were born, a chasm opened in my heart and all the world’s love flowed in. For you. I can’t wait to see who you are and how you impact the world. Happy birthday, love. Thanks for being born in my lifetime.