My life, in bullet points:

I've been too busy worrying and baking to write in full sentences. So here is an update:

• Ella has officially started to walk. Currently it is only four steps at a time. But, it’s upright. It’s forward motion. It’s progress.
  
• We went Christmas tree hunting on Saturday. Felled a big ‘un. I think all the camouflage and face paint paid off. It never saw us coming.
  
• I still do not know if in three weeks I will have a job. Or a raise. Not sure if my day at the office is best spent boxing up our organizational records or writing grant proposals. My head is about to explode.
  
• Jay likes decorating the Christmas tree. Again and again. He has redecorated it about eleven hundred times now, each time exclaiming, “It’s time to decorate the Christmas tree! It’s a happy Christmas day!”
  
• To take my mind off the work thing, I have delved full scale into the holidays. We have holiday music on nonstop at home, wrote letters to Santa, decorated our deck with lights (solar powered LEDs- which you think would be cool, except they’re not really. They are a freakish blue and only come on when they are good and ready, which is not until they have had a nice sunshiny day, and then only when they think it is dark enough for you to fully appreciate them. Argh.) We are reading holiday themed books, picked out a few holiday DVDs from the library, are planning a Solstice celebration and are baking, baking, baking. Mostly cookies, which I then inhale.
  
• I have made way too many batches of cut out Christmas cookies. I have eaten way too many batches of cut out Christmas cookies. And soon I will only be able to wear bed sheets.
  
• Focusing on the holidays works well until I boot up my computer on Monday morning, and remember that the countdown towards unemployment could be measured in days. And then I want to throw up.
  
• Back to the holidays. Think good thoughts. Happy, happy, joy, joy. My favorite Christmas song is….
  
• But the work thing. Shit.
  
• No, focus on the positive. Things will be o.k. Really.
  
• But, three weeks. Twenty- one days. Potential unemployment. [panicky, quick breathing like you see pregnant women do on TV who are in labor in a taxi cab]
  
• Breathe deeply, things will be fine. We’ll be fine. The organization will be fine. All will be fine.
  
• No, not fine. This is scary. Scary is not fine.
  
• Listen, cool it. The sun is shining, you have a terrific family, good friends and everybody is healthy.
  
• Can it, Pollyanna.
  
• Oy.
  
• Does anyone have any Christmas cookies?

Well folks, that’s about it right now. I wish I had some funny, insightful, thoughtful stuff to post today, but mostly I am thinking in emotional bullet points and run on sentences fraught with stress and worry. Aren’t you glad you visited?

If you have any good holiday baking recipes, now would be a great time to send them my way….